No one ever asks the right questions.

Posts tagged “characters

Ten Minutes Later…

Okay, I know I just was ranting about how the song “Anything For You” was completely Konnor, and it made me freak out. Well I was wrong. It’s from Nightlife. But it’s not his. Oh, god, it’s not his!

It’s Anthony’s. Which makes me want to cry, because the song is suddenly so different with it being his. I can’t express it now. I might just have to go sob in a corner. Poor, poor, Anthony. What the hell did I do to that poor boy? It’s almost criminal how much I hurt him.

He has a happy ending though, so I can have a little bit of solice in that. Now, excuse me, while I go and write.


Konnor, Corrin, and Music

I wish I remembered my dreams, so that I could remember dreaming about my characters. Especially Corrin and Konnor. The two of them facinate me. They’re so unalike, but yet they stay by each others side like brothers. “A vengeful God and the merciful Lucifer” as put by Konnor.

I’ve just downloaded another couple of Evanescence songs I’ve never heard of, and I found “Anything For You”, as well as “Eternal”. Both of which are awesome to write to, though the former, is completely, consumingly Konnor. I had a bit of a freak out when I heard it the first time. Parcially because his love is so beautiful, so eternal, and so completely doomed that I feel sorry for what I put him through. Or rather, what Kane puts him through. But, then, no one knows about that, do they?

I’m especially upset that no one in the world knows who Konnor is- besides Lily, and she really doesn’t count because she doesn’t know the whole story either. But he is probably the most interesting, most devilish character I’ve written in a long time. I want so desperately to finish his story, but the only problem is that I know what happens at the end and the middle of the story, not the begining. And, if i’ve learned well from the botched attempt at outlining, I need to write a story all the way through in order to get it done. But, after reading about how Stephanie Meyer started Twilight in the middle, it makes me wonder if I should just start it that way. It’ll be a lot of work, but it might be worth it.

It just might see daylight afterall, no pun intended.

Rachel, though, is a problem, as is Draven. The two of them end up having a relationship, but I don’t know how it’ll play out. I’m sort of waiting for it to do that out on paper, and they’ll figure it out for themselves. Which makes my whole “start in the middle” idea go to hell. Ugh! They’re so annoying. Why can’t they just tell me what’s going to happen so I don’t have to live in all this suspense?

But no, my character’s like to suprise me. Fancy that, they like seeing me freak out almost as much as I like watching other people freak out. Lucky me.

Like, for instance, I was writing Logan’s chapter, discribing how he had saved Silas’s life when they were thirteen, and there was an undertone there that I could almost consider love- and it brought to mind the nature of friendship, and how it was only a downplayed version of love. So, I asked myself, has any of my Divine tried to take those friendships one step further, like…Xsen and Arazorn maybe?

The answer came back with a vauge sense of nonchalance. “Of course,” they said, “We’ve all had flings now and again.” At one point or another, they told me, there was certain pairings between all sort of characters, gender aside. And what does it matter? At the time it happened, there was no reason for it to be considered wrong.

And so, now, thanks to my characters who are probably giggling at my frustrations and embaressment, I can not get the image of Sara and Dianna kissing out of my head. Thanks a lot!

But I digress. “Feels Like Home” by Fort Minor is also a good Nightlife song, as is- ironically enough, seeing as it just started playing- “Understanding” by Evanescence. “Lose Control” I just figured out fits Lily’s book, so now it is banned from all my playlists. “Farther Away” was always good, I just happened to find a new version of it that fits the character better.

And, now that I’m thinking about it, I’ve devided up my playlists according to my mood: “Apassionata,” “Beat the Clock,” “Better to Have Loved and Lost,” “Caught in the Rain,” “Darkness, Consuming,” “Dead Before Dawn,” “Death Becomes Me,” “Going Dark,” “Just Plain Pissed” (can’t you guess?), “Keep Me Here,” “Live Only Once,” “Love at First Kiss,” “The Seduction,” “A Slave to Passion,” “Solemnly Serene,” “Trance” and “The End Must Come.”  Can you guess which one is which?


Damnit! I did it again…

I told myself I wouldn’t. No. I swore that I wouldn’t go there. No demons. No witches. That goes into territories that I should never be alowed into. I’d already destroyed the vampire myth, lets not destroy the myths of angels and devils, of witches and magic, more than what I already have. But, of course, thanks to the new flyleaf CD, I am going to have to go and write it. And not only that, but I’m going to have to go and add another map to my wall, come up with a new cast of characters, run the plot into the ground and work with how demon blood works.

Promises be damned, aparently. I’m going to write it whether I like it or not.

Yet, in a way, I really do want to write it. It’s got some amazing characters, case and point from the Flyleaf CD. That’s how this whole thing got started. I heard the new song called “Again” and listened to it, trying to figure out which vampire it belonged too, but none of them were fessing up. It was bugging me, because I knew it was important, and I knew the character was very strong and very forceful, and really wanted to get me to write about him. So, frowning, I serfed Behind The Name for a good name that means “strong,” and ended up settling on a name that fit the idea of the character very well: Jerek. So, quite pleased with myself, I went over the lyrics to flesh out my new character. For the life of me, though, I could not see this noble spirit in a modern setting. In fact, all I could see him in was a castle, swordfighting…sitting on top of a stone wall…looking out to a ramshakel little village… with a woman’s hand on his cheek as she pleads with him, but he turns away…and talking with a boy with blonde hair. This last image was the most forceful, because it’s less talking and more arguing.  I frowned at this, and went over who it might be. Cian? No. He didn’t feel like Cian, didn’t have his cockiness. I thought for a little while longer, and then I got it.

Jerek was from Nightlife, but he wasn’t a vampire, wasn’t a werwolf, and didn’t belong in a modern setting, and did not belong among vampires and werewolves.

Some might be asking, how the hell does that work? I thought you said that there was only vampires and werewolves and the general humans in Nightlife. How can he be none of those? Well, I’ve mentioned Corrigan’s Story, I think, where a half-demon boy lives in slavery under the ruler of a great city which is completely full of vampires and werewolves and demons and angels and witches… I never bothered to do anything about it because it involved demons and witches and angels, which I didn’t want to try and deal with. But this song, and this new character convinced me that it’s worth picking up.

Another story I promised myself I wouldn’t continue on with: the Thirteen Cities, spurred both from an idea from something I read and a half-assed attempted at co-writing with Lily. It never got really far, because there is a large chunk of the begining that I didn’t want to write because all it was there was because it was supposed to explain what would happen later. I’d guess that when finished, this would have amounted to at least thirty to fifty pages, an amount I really didn’t want to write. However, now I’m considering pulling the cheep writer’s card and erasing his memory at a certain point so that I can just start writing right there at the begining of the fun. Unfortunately, it would be cutting it rather close to the the fun, but I could very easily deal with that. I could always write about it, and cut it out later. But, unfortunately, this is not a good thing. It just makes it one more thing for me to be thinking about, one more thing for me to try and write. Out of the many I already have going, another is making me crazy. I have a problem settling on only one now, so how could I possibly force myself to write when I have a deadline. I don’t do well with other people telling me what to do, which sucks for you people, doesn’t it?

Speaking of which, I changed my name again, in case you haven’t noticed. I don’t remember if I explained the fact that I talk to people in my head, but if I have and even if I haven’t, I took the name from my creativity and my intellegence. It seems to kind of suit me.

I’m getting quite depressed that you don’t know anything about any of my characters. I feel like putting something up on here for you just so that I can continue on with my life without being slowly driven crazy. But that’s dangerous. I’m so afraid someone’s going to try to steal him- and you have no idea the humor that phrasing has brought to mind. With my character’s being so real, and Cian being the most cooperative for me, I bet he’d put up a hell of a fight for anyone that tried to tackle his character but me. So, if I do put up his sotry in a burst of insanity, then no one had better touch him or your going to get your teeth knocked out, I don’t care who or where you are. I will hunt you down and kill you. So please, stay away from my character’s and my ideas. I work hard on those.

Stephanie Meyer seemed to get really depressed when someone leaked her book on the internet. I personally would just get really really angry. And speaking of Stephanie Meyer, who’s going to see New Moon on the 20th? If you are, don’t tell me how it ends- even though I know because I read the book- I’m going on the 21st wearing my Jacob shirt, Edward be damned.

Over and out.


Happy Samhain! [And a Nightlife Rant…]

…or Halloween, if you don’t know what Samhain is. Go look it up. My mother corrected my pronunciation yesterday, I had thought that it was pronounced how it was spelled (Sam-hay/n), but really it’s supposed to sound like (Sow-an) because the original spelling looked like “Sauin”. I love the ancient Celts, as you can obviously tell. And, if it’s less obvious, I’m going a little crazy lately. It might just be that Samhain was yesterday, and I’m all jittery from the candy and the fact that I’ve written close to twenty pages this weekend, which tops all the writing I’ve done this year. (Unfortunately not for NaNoReMo, which I had forgotten all about until just this second, and I don’t know what I could possibly write for it. At this rate I’m not going to do it after all.) It’s not just the quantity of my writing that surprises me, but what the writing’s about. Because, you see, when I began writing about vampires, I promised myself to leave out all the inappropriate stuff, let it be there, but be implied, so that I won’t have to deal with it. Sadly enough, though, all that stuff I didn’t want to write about has become an intricate part of the storyline. My vampires have become, essentially, the place where I write about the things I don’t usually have the courage to write about in my other things. A dumping ground for my hormones.

To go along with this insanity, I’ve been listening to the music I’ve always promised myself I would stay away from. On my current playlist, I have Akon [Right Now and Sexy Bitch], Boys Like Girls [Love Drunk], Cherish [Killa], Cascada [Evacuate the Dancefloor], Katy Perry [I Kissed a Girl], Muse [Undisclosed Desires and Uprising], Britney Spears [Shattered Glass, Circus, 3, and If You Seek Amy], Beyonce [Sweet Dreams], and Jason Derulo [Whatcha Say]. All of which scares the hell out of me, because of the mood it gets me in. I write best when I’m in a mood that fits what I’m writing, and when your writing sex scenes, then what mood do you have to be in?

Alright, that’s a bit of a lie. I wrote three pages about two people talking after such shenanigans took place, and twenty-five or so about one of the most dreaded vampires in existence kind of falling for a boy he finds in the dungeons. I’m struggling to keep it as a friendship, but I’m not sure Cian will let me. He’s been very forceful with how the story is going so far. In fact, he’s one of the most stubborn characters I’ve ever had the trouble of talking to. So much so is that I’m reluctant to even take credit for what I just wrote, he basically dictated it all to me. Even with Konnor I have to drag the plot of them, but Cian gives it to me freely. I kind of wonder why, but after rereading what I just wrote about him, it’s not very often that he understands his own motives to do anything. I feel kind of sad that those thirty some-odd pages won’t get to see daylight, because if I fixed it properly, I could quite easily change that into a book. It was in 1968 though, so it might be a little difficult for me to understand a certain point I kind of glossed over in the thing I just wrote.

Anyway, I move onward. I haven’t written much that hasn’t involved vampires lately, and that doesn’t help you, who knows very little about my Nightlife series I felt kind of sad about that, too. In all my books, I’m always overwhelmed at all the crap I have to work at, to research, to figure out, but in Nightlife most of the important things are figured out, so the rest is easy. I love how it turned out, and how if someone points to a name on the vampire family tree, it’s very likely I can tell you the circumstances of how they died, who they were and how they interact in the vampire world. Certain lines I can explain quite well, while others are still a mystery to me. There are still plenty of blank spots on that list, and it will have easily over 1000 names when I’m done. I also enjoy how the characters talk to me much easier in that series. Like, for instance, the boy that Cian falls for’s name is Aaron, and the reason he was captured is because he went into a vampire club intending to slaughter them all. The reason, I found, he wanted to do that was because a family member had been slaughtered by a vampire. But I was at a loss for a little while, because he didn’t seem like the type to get angry at just that. It needed to be huge. So I thought about it some more, and it seemed only natural that his brother was an addict, and that brother got turned and killed another brother. That’s why Aaron was pissed. I went to go look for him on the family tree, or find a place for him, and there was Brigitte, a girl from 1963 who falls in love with a side character from Konnor’s story, who was turned because a friend of hers introduced her to Ramses who took a liking to her. It seemed only natural that that friend was Aaron’s brother. It fit perfectly, because one of the other girls that Ramses turned had a nice gap in those that she turned that fit him in nicely. and made it so that this story had a nice relevancy to the other stories in Nightlife, so, if I chose, I could easily find an excuse to stick it in there.

To make an already long story shorter, it’s getting very fun, because my characters are becoming more and more real, and it helped me figure out that the only way that I, personally, am able to develop characters is to write their backstories, from beginning to end, and see what it reveals. Because one of my favorite things to do is to figure out how the vampires on my family tree were turned, this is a very nice and easy way for me to make that world real.

Lily and I asked each other which of our books we would go into, given the opportunity. I told her that it was easily Nightlife, because of what I know about the characters. I would go straight to Stalking Shadow, the NYC club, and just start talking to them. I know so much about them that I could probably get away with a lot of things, and almost certainly get turned. And, that, I think, would be the most fun out of everything, don’t you think?


Thoughts

I was thinking a few minutes ago about my subconscious. But then again, that wasn’t really what I was thinking about. It startedwhen I was reading LJ Smith’s FAQ page on her website, and reading about what she thinks is magic and what an aspiring writer should do, and- more importantly- about which character it was that she liked writing the most. And that got me thinking (which is never a good idea, it never ends once it starts) exactly which characters I liked writing the most (the answer is Arazorn the Dark, by the way, along with Zachariah and Vilaneis), and as I was skimming through, that thought in my head, I wandered into the message “keep a list of story ideas”. So, going through my folders and haphazard organizational system, intending to write down a short blurb about this new idea I’ve been working on, when I realized I had already done it, and put it in its own folder. So, sitting back for a few seconds and looking at the many different ideas under Nightlife (not including the rather large folder titled “Origin and Backstories”), I suddenly remember the dream I had had a very long time ago that I haven’t yet forgotten.

I’ve told Lily about this dream once (twice actually, because she forgot the first time), so she knows what I’m talking about already, but for those who don’t I’ll explain it in short. From what I remember, it took place in a large dark room with cobwebs and spiders- a large bush of thorns in the center. Konnor was there, with Rachel at his arm, surrounded by what I presumed to be a whole bunch of vampires. They certainly had the vibe. It was quiet and dark- underground maybe. The telltale glass windows up above held hundreds more vampires and other damnable creatures watching down on the spectacle. It felt very serious, and very churchlike- as if speaking would be considered sacrilege. I might have been present, but I’m not sure. It kept switching back and forth from third person to first, as my dreams and waking mind often does. Konnor, in all of his arrogant glory, looks to the door and quotes softly to himself. “And he shall be born in the fiery thorns.” He glanced back to the bush before saying briskly. “Where is Xsen?”

Whoa. My mental self recoiled at the very thought. Let me explain, if you don’t understand. My stories partake in completely different worlds, different places and different times. There had been absolutely no connection between the worlds before this dream. Whenever I had ever dreamed of my characters, it had been with characters of the same book. I make sure that they stay separate in my mind. It’s too confusing otherwise. But in this dream, Konnor, Rachel and all of the vampires and werewolves were watching and waiting for something. No, someone. Xsen. From Divine Wars, a completely different idea.

But Konnor knew of him, obviously, and was waiting for him.

Nikolai- or someone, but I felt that it was supposed to be Nikolai- was pulled through the door, struggling against the hold of two large vampires, who, in retrospect, just might be Renatus and Remus. Which makes me quite happy that they took a little stop into my dreams. Yay! Anyway, he was dragged, kicking and struggling, into the thorn bush and pushed into it.

In seconds, his body is covered with the rapidly grown plants, encased. I can see his claustrophobia, and he starts breathing in quick.

Xsen comes in then, in the flourish that is usually known more for Zemnea, (what can I say, I have a think for the theatrics) three people behind him that I assume to be some sort of servants, though why Xsen would want them I wouldn’t guess. This was not my beloved Logan though, with the silvery locks of moonlight and deep pensive green eyes. No, this is Geovanni- deep fire-red hair, tattoos down his neck, red eyes alight with the flame he never bothered to learn to quench. (For those that don’t know, I entertained the thought of Logan dying and having another lifetime over the course of the series- who would be Geovanni. I, personally, loved the idea of Geovanni, because he was the exact opposite of Logan in every way, and thus exactly what I loved about him coming to the surface. The idea crashed and burned for the Divine Wars, but a mythical fourth book is brewing on the edges of my brain, you may yet get to see him) Geovanni turned to face Konnor, looking like his younger brother. He said something along the lines of “I said I would come, didn’t I?” in his contemptuous voice.

Konnor crossed his arms. “You’d better do it now, then.”

And with one glance from Xsen, the entire brush erupts into a column of burn flame which dances in Konnor’s eyes as he watches.

And then I woke up.

It was a pretty awesome dream, all and all. But it made me realize that while my conscious brain tries very hard to keep the ideas separate, my subconscious self doesn’t even bother. In fact, it found a nice was to meld them together. Since then, I’ve had a few more containing characters from different books interacting together. And, I have to say, it has some very interesting relationships. If not for that dream, how could I have known Psychos hated promiscuous women, or that Konnor thought that Xsen was stuck up? How could I have know that Rose and Thunder would have chemistry, or that Jason wouldn’t be able to keep his temper for five minutes in the same room as Arazorn the Dark? Since then, I’ve had them interact in my mind together, and learned some pretty interesting things. Maybe one day, when they invent a machine to put thoughts into pictures like I really want them too. But until then, I guess you’re going to just have to look at it yourself.

EDIT, five hours later: I’ve recently become addicted to music from “the Red Violin”, in order to have something in the background similiar to that of a character in a short story. It’s turning out to be really freaking creepy. Which probably you knew by hearing about the background music, huh? Go look up the premise of that movie if you don’t know. Then tell me I’m not crazy.


NaNoWriMo and Cainredeemed

Haven’t been here in a while, too busy with my finals (which I’ll have in about an hour, I’m doing this on the school computer) and last night I was procrastinating majorly to write and to study. I was searching on google things to use for world building, which is not my strongest suit when it comes to writing. I came across this. It looks extremely helpful for some of my High Fantasy works. So I was going through it, and over and over I came across something called NaNoWriMo (try saying that a couple of times really really fast).

So it started to bug me. What the hell was NaNoWriMo? So I googled it, (gotta love google)  and I came across this. So I started to surf the place, trying to figure out what exactly it was and what would happen if I did decide to join it.

It turns out that NaNoWriMo is a kind of game you play with yourself, where you ty to write 50,000 words from November 1st to November 30th. I was kind of shocked. Who in there right mind could write that much in a month? And then I went under the winners. There are 725 pages worth of them. 725 pages worth of people who wrote over 50,000 words. That’s 1,643,343,993 words last year alone. What the hell…? So I reluctantly signed up. So don’t bug me in November this year. I haven’t exactly decided what I’ll actually be writing, though, and I’m considering rewriting In Black and White from scratch. I had been planning to give it major reconstructive surgery anyway, so why not try it this time?

And the second part of the title! Cainredeemed is the username of one of my best friends on here. He’s writing something too. Go check it out! Please! He’s awesome!


Sick and Bored

I’m sick again. And bored. (Hense the title, right?) Of course, a cold isn’t exactly the bubonic plague, so I wouldn’t put me under quarentine. Two things in perticular that bring me back here: the new short story I’ve posted, with an explaination of how it came about at the begining.

The second being the new song I’ve fallen in love with: “The Clincher” by Chevelle. It works with apsolutely none of my characters (except maybe Rose if you want to stretch things) which is nice because that doesn’t happen very often. So I’m probably end up playing it to death, along with “Perfect Enemy” by T.a.T.u, another one that fits into none of my books. However, “Perfect Enemy” I heard in a cool Kingdom Hearts CoM video on youtube. I don’t remember what it was called, except that it involved Namine falling for Marluxia. Which is weird, in a way…

Chevelle is turning out to be my new favorite band as of late. “The Red” is insanely cool, because it’s so thouroughly Draven, from one of my Nightlife stories. I like that one, and I’m slowly waning through the rest to see which ones I like best.

Another song to character update: “Heir of a Dying Day” by Lacuna Coil is going to be added to the music list, as is “The Red” and “Dead Memories” by Slipknot, who I don’t usually listen to.

Quick thing to add before I say farewell, I’ve change the title from Dancing Shadows (again, yes I realize) to Black Flame, which fits better than any of the others have before. So I’m hoping this one will day the same for at least a little longer. Fire Eyes in the Dark is going back to Moonlight Reign. (dispite my previous post, I know).

One last thing, I promise: Beth Fantaskey’s Jessica’s Guide to Dating on the Dark Side, Allison van Diepen’s Raven and, at my mother’s sugestion, Dean Koontz’s Odd Thomas were great books, not exactly my favorite, because I usually don’t read about Dragomir princesses, break-dancing immortals, and short order cooks that can see ghosts  (or do I now that I think about it?), but good books nonetheless. Go check them out!


The Meaning of “Fire Eyes in the Dark”

I’ve been considering exactly what possessed me to start up a blog. I never pay attention to them, and they always end up dying out. People never read them, and I have nothing to say. Yet here I am, writing about how I have nothing to say on a blog that I have no idea why I started it.

And then comes the curious title. I’ve recently been wondering about that as well. I only have a vague impression of where “Fire Eyes in the Dark “came from, and why I chose it as a title for this. I believe it was during my Moonlight Reign phase, when I was completely enthralled by Rose and Kar’s relationship. He says to her:

“Your eyes…I’ve never noticed them before.” he whispered in her ear, his voice soft, yet thick with his pain. “My fire-eyes…so beautiful. Don’t let the shadows of this day stifle that brilliance, Rose. Keep your light burning bright.”

And that’s not the only reason. Green eyes are a theme for him in that book. You don’t know who he’s supposed to end up with because of them. Right now, I don’t perticularly know what woman he’s supposed to be with.

Right now, there’s not much going on. I’m procrastinating (again) and thinking about going to work on Logan and Dianna’s backstory, while watch the Fallen for the fifteenth time today. Then I should probably get my homework done…

Ugh. Moving on. I should probably get to work. Just checking in, and musing to myself.


Vampires, Divine Cars and Short Stories

Hello, Maureen here. It’s currently a whopping 12 degrees with a -2 degree windshield. To put it in stupid terms: it’s pretty damn cold here. Even the house, heated though it may be, is freezing. I’m sitting here at the dining room table, typing away, shivering and watching “Interview with the Vampire” and “Queen of the Damned” as I write pieces of Nightlife.

Currently it’s in the middle of “Interview with the Vampire” and I’m suddenly quite enthralled by it. I’ve forgotten just how besotted I am with these movies. Kristen Dunst is amazing in that movie. Besides watching the story of “the saddest vampire you will ever see”, I am trying with difficulty to think of something new to say in my very boring life.

Ah! Lily-wa will appreciate this one. I’ve recently been trying to figure out what cars each of my characters have, if any. Most everyone I know who is at least seventeen knows how to drive, and seeing that they are gods, my characters should have cars. Like Logan, my favorite. Recently, in writing the beginning of the second Divine Wars, I’ve made it so that he’s got a Maserati.

Yep. A Maserati. Very creative of me, no?

I thought not. But I thought I should establish that he has an awesome car. Mat, I think, should have a alright car. Sara will not, her parents are too protective, and Silas will have a secondhand car. Of course, Silas won’t be able to use said car in the series, so it kind of defeats the purpose. Selene does not need a car, and Dianna does not either, though she probably could have one if she wants, but she doesn’t really want it, she fends for herself well enough. The guys in my story, I feel, need material things. Of course, Logan does not exactly want to except his grandfather’s gift of an Italian sports car, but he agrees reluctantly enough. And in being a practical man, he knows that to have it sit in his sister’s driveway would be a waste, so he uses it. Not often, but enough. After the first book he uses it a lot more.

Anyway, enough about cars and on to my most recent thing I’ve been doing. I’ve actually been considering putting up some of my short stories for people to read. I know that in boredom I like to surf this website for people’s writing and look for tips on how to write my own, and little details that I can use in mine. Hopefully, people care enough to come on here and read them.

Yet, alas, who am I to know if I write well? I’m constantly assured that I’m great and that I shouldn’t worry if people like it or not. Teachers compliment me occasionally, and when students read my excerpts they tell me that it’s really good. Yet, again, how should I know? I still have my doubt as to how well I’m writing. Maybe somebody on here, someone who does not know me and doesn’t care nearly as much about hurting my feelings. I’d be really happy if someone could please critique my writing. It’s appreciated. Thanks for listen to my rant. It’s over now.


Characterization

Midterms are over- and aren’t at the same time, I had a snow day today even though I was only going to do my Science Midterm and then go home- and tomorrow I have no school. So here I am, exhausted, and writing on here yet again, and doubting, yet again, whether or not it should be left up here. Then again, I’m forced to admit that it’s a nice way to keep everything organized not to mention that it’s a nice way to procrastinate. But before I came on here, I was reading.

Oh. My. God. Sometimes reading makes me feel so inferior to these amazing books I read. Robert Jordan, Terry Goodkind, David Eddings & Leigh Eddings [The Redemption of Althalus]… They’re all spectacularly above me. They’re the kind of people I only get the privilege of seeing their shoes, and maybe their coat tail. I cannot imagine anyone being moved by my writing in the way that I’m moved by them. It sometimes depresses me. Anyway, that’s not what I was getting at. These books are absolutely spectacular. The Redemption of Althalus and the Sword of Truth Series are both on my top five, and Robert Jordan’s Wheel of Time is probably on my top twenty. I’d definitely recommend them.

Once again, I’m getting off track. Books like these get me thinking. Like, for instance, the Sword of Truth Series gets me thinking about human nature and the rules of it. For those that don’t know them, those rules are here. I empathize with the characters more so than I so with my own (and that’s pretty sad, when you think about it). They become real people to me. I hate them and I love them, I wince when they do something stupid and I cheer them on when they’re going in the right direction. It’s a sad world indeed when I’m not really getting my character’s to be as real to me as the characters of other writers.

Let me attempt to explain something here. I search through the websites of some of my favorite authors looking for the faintest hint of a tip for my own way of writing, I’ll take advice where I can get it (everyone is way to nice to me- I never get the criticism that I know that my writing needs). On Stephanie Meyer’s website, she frequently mentions that the character’s she’s created talk to her in her head as she writes and almost dictate the story to her. I’m a bit of a control freak, so I can’t give over that kind of control, but it only makes sense that the personalities that you create should be nearly as real as you are. So, whenever I get the opportunity- like in the nice quite time that after my midterms where I only have myself for company- I hold long conversations with the people I’ve created. Of course, some of them I’m kind of afraid to talk to right now, they don’t come into the plot until later and they freak out everyone else in the story, but the main characters I talk to all the time. Sadly enough, though, the ending is not exactly finished, and the parts that I have finished aren’t exactly closed off: I left a big enough opening so that when I’m done I can continue it on if I can’t let go of them. The characters- now that they’re slowly coming into being for me- resent some of the endings I’ve come up with for them. I challenge all of the relationships, create new ones and mess with people’s heads (especially in the third book, everything goes to hell in that one). Mat, Dianna, and Logan are the ones I’m fleshing out right now, and talking with the most. Sara I’m warily thinking about talking to, along with Selene. Silas I have pretty much down already, so I’m not going to do that to him (I screw with his life a lot more than the rest, and I don’t think that he’d like to answer my questions anyway). Logan is trying to get on my good side right now, because he really really doesn’t want me to write the mythical fourth book. I screw him over more than probably anyone can get screwed over in that one. He dislikes me for that.

In any case, the previous paragraph is an explanation if I mention “Logan says” or “Dianna says” or “Selene is mad at me”, enough so that you won’t be confused by it.